All Products

so tired card

“Can I get canceled? I’m so tired.” DETAILS // • Size: 5.5 x 4.25 • Inside Message: blank • Paper: e...

knees card

“You’re young at heart. But your knees are mostly decorative now. Happy Birthday!” DETAILS // • Size...

dance card

“‘Just because you can’t dance, doesn't mean you shouldn’t dance.’ – Alcohol” DETAILS // • Size: 5.5...

Fascism card

“Say what you will about fascism but I’ve totally forgotten about seasonal depression.” DETAILS // •...

anxiety napkins

“It’s almost time to switch from my everyday anxiety to my fancy Christmas anxiety.” DETAILS // • Si...

carbs card

“Whatever you’re going throughright now, carbs are the answer.” DETAILS // • Size: 5.5 x 4.25 • Insi...

trump motherfucker card

“Trump is an evil mother fucker. Have a nice day!” DETAILS // • Size: 4.25 x 5.5 • Inside ...

metabolism card

“It’s all fun and games until your metabolism slows down. Happy Birthday.” DETAILS // • Size: 5.5 x ...

phone holiday card

“’Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house, everyone was on their phone.” DETAILS /...

instagram scrolling card

“Daily Activity Level: 60 minutes of aerobic Instagram scrolling.” DETAILS // • Size: 5.5 x 4.25 • I...

podcast/follow-through card

“We go together like podcast advice and zero follow-through.” DETAILS // • Size: 5.5 x 4.25 • Inside...

fast walker card

“Half of all marriages end because one person walks too fast.” DETAILS // • Size: 5.5 x 4.25 • Insid...